Sweet mother of God I am tired.
The past two nights in a row I have passed out - and I mean passed out: mouth open, shamelessly drooling but definitely not snoring because I don't do that, a BOMB could go off and it wouldn't wake me, deep asleep, no later than 9:45 p.m.
But I wake up just as tired in the morning. I stare at my phone, blaring it's awful alarm sounds at me through one half open eye, just wishing I could stay in bed a little longer. At some point during the day, I hit a freaking wall and all I want to do is crash and pass out under my desk.
This is usually when you can find me getting my second cup of coffee or shoveling Girl Scout cookies in my face like a junky shovels coke up their nose, only to later be crouched behind my desk getting the sugar crash sweats and shakes.
What I concluded from all of this recently is that I desperately need to get back on the Paleo wagon.
I fell off in a big way earlier this month...or at the end of last month....See?! My whole concept of time is skewed!! When I got an ear infection that caused weird stabby head pain, which I was all too ready to blame on carb withdrawl.
It was a desperate attempt to excuse myself for going face first into a loaf of garlic bread, I know that now.
But alas the ear infection is gone, my muffin top is back and my face is breaking out like Chris Angel from a minimum security prison.
So, back on the Paleo wagon I go.
One thing I know is I need to kind of ease into this shit, and I need to stop being so damn lazy about cooking at night when I get off work.
Ok, that's two things I know, but still.
This diet does not work if you eat out every night, or even twice a week. You might be able to squeak by with eating out once a week, if you go to a sit down restaurant that has good, meaty salads or you hit a fast food joint that will give you a double cheeseburger, protein style, but it's not quality food and the contents are suspect, and if you're me no matter how much you say you won't eat
some all of your boyfriends fries, you know damn well that you will.
So it's best just to eat at home.
BUT the good news is you can still have dark chocolate, wine and tequila, and amazing salads like this:
What more does a girl need?!